Sunday 5 August 2018

Saying you love me is a torture: let’s part

We keep our theme of relationships that don't work with today's Chinese song 说你爱我 | Shuō nǐ ài wǒ, "Saying you love me", which I met in 2012 somewhere within 20/1 and translated to English and French, twice (well, almost, as of editing this on 24/12/23), so I'll give you horridous oldity and good news like I do with Japanese songs :).
  1. To English… um, I'd expect it to have been translated soon afterwards, but no work was done on it at least up till 18/2 where a mail lists it as not dealt with, and then all I have is a vague memory of singing it on my school trip to Munich (20-22/3);
    1. «As it rains» and «Let our love's fall / Wholly be bright red» pop up on my English notebook, on 24/5, which look like a correction to a translation… except there is no record of said translation; well, not in that notebook, at least: the Science notebook does have the "sci q" version below (tucked away into the first tab because there's no French analogue) dated 19/3/12;
    2. The 28/7 11:01 file has no translation for the song, but the manuscripts for both versions, dated to 9/8 by the mega-intro, are found on the printout of that file; I somehow had the misconception that the printout manuscripts were from 26/7 when I edited their versions in, hence why the sci q version is together with them and they are before the 18/8; not willing to fix that right now; since it's so late, that manuscript probably was aware of the sci q version;
    3. The English original version only pops up in the following 5/8/12 19:26 file, in its original form below, save for the «never go vanish» variant;
    4. Said variant appears to have been corrected on 18/8/12, where a file from 15:27 shows the variant and another one from 20:54 makes it disappear;
    5. There are then more recent tweaks leading to the other version; on those, I quote the old version of this intro: «Oh, and while writing this post, I saw a misunderstanding I thought I'd removed from the translations was still there, so I revisited those translations, the English one by 15:25, the French one by 15:32, on Aug 5 2018. […] 11/4/20 I notice I mistranslated 甜蜜 to beauty/beauté when it actually means sweetness/douceur. Fixing 12/4/20 14:18»;
  2. «I guess the French version comes from that summer, as a column-filler», and indeed the manuscript is right next to that of the English; the 5/8 file doesn't show it, since the manuscript is from 9/8, while the 18/8 15:27 file has the original version below; the other version is a revisiting from 5/8/18 at 15:32, plus a 12/4/20 fix mentioned in the previous item too;
The singer here suggests to end the relationship because she sees her partner is distant ("Saying you love me / Has become a greeting") and feels she cannot bear the weight of a promise to "come with me to the end". Quora'ed what 把爱坠落让满地鲜红 means at this link. Let's see it!


下着雨
让尘气稀释回忆
我靠着你不出声音
看着你
看着斑驳的甜蜜
爱你
困住你也困住我自己

我那躲也躲不掉的微妙伤口
隐隐作痛
你那戒也戒不掉的甜蜜借口
也让我精神腐朽

说你爱我
变成一种问候
不如趁早放手
把爱坠落
让满地鲜红
说你爱我
变成一种折磨
不用陪我走到最后
我承担不起你的承诺
Xiàzhe yǔ
Ràng chénqì xīshì huíyì
Wǒ kàozhe nǐ bù chū shēngyīn
Kànzhe nǐ
Kànzhe bānbó de tiánmì
Ài nǐ
Kùnzhù nǐ yě kùnzhù wǒ zìjǐ

Wǒ nà duǒ yě duǒ bù diào de wéimiào shāngkǒu
Yǐnyǐn zuòtòng
Nǐ nà jiè yě jiè bù diào de tiánmì jièkǒu
Yě ràng wǒ jīngshén fǔxiǔ

Shuō nǐ ài wǒ
Biànchéng yīzhǒng wènhòu
Bùrú chènzǎo fàngshǒu
Bǎ ài zhuìluò
Ràng mǎn dì xiānhóng
Shuō nǐ ài wǒ
Biànchéng yīzhǒng zhémó
Bùyòng péi wǒ zǒu dào zuìhòu
Wǒ chéngdān bù qǐ nǐ de chéngnuò
Rain comes down,
Let smoke dilute my mem’ries.
I lean on you and make no sound.
Watching you,
I see a varied beauty,
Love you,
As I hug you, I hug my own self.

That my soft wound which will hide but never ci go off
Is a dull pain.
Your sweet quibbling you'll avoid but ne'er will take off,
Yeah, will make my spirit rot!

Say you love me,
Get to be a greeting,
Best leave me while you can
Let our love fall
Be it all bright red!
Say you love me,
Get to be a torture,
You need not comestay with me to the͜ end
I cannot yet endure your promise.
Rain comes down
Let smoke dilute my mem’ries
I lean on you and make no sound
Watching you
I see a varied beauty
I love you
As I hug you I hug my own self

That soft wound that always hide[s] but never goes off
Is a dull pain
That sweet quibbling you avoid but never take off,
Yeah, will make my spirit rot!

Say you love me
Get to be a greeting
Best leave me while you can
Let our love fall
Be it all bright red
Say you love me
Get to be a torture
You need not come with me to th’ end
I cannot yet endure your promise.



Commelorsqu' il pleut
Que l' Fumée, mes mémoires efface.
J’ m’appuie à toi et n’ fais pas d’ sons
Je t’ regarde,
J’ vois une beauté variée
Je t’aime
Comme je t’embrasse, j’embrasse moi-même

Ma[->Cette] p’tite plaie qui se cache mais ne->n’ s’en va jamais, une
Langueur monotone
Ta[->Cette] excuse douce que t’évite[s] mais n’ dépose jamais,
Yeah, me fait pourrir l’esprit !

Dis que tu m’aimes
Un salut deviens donc
Laisse-moi car c’est mieux
Tue l’amour, et
Que tout soit rouge clair
Dis que tu m’aimes
Une torture deviens donc
Tu dois pas me->m’ suivre jusqu’à la fin
Je peux pas supporter ta promission
As it rains
Let smoke dilute my mem’ries
I lean on you and make no sound
Watching you
I see a varied beauty
I love you
As I hug you I hug my own self

That my soft wound that will hide but never vanish
Is a dull pain
That sweet quibbling you avoid but never take off,
Yeah, will make my spirit rot!

Say you love me
Get to be a greeting
Best leave me while you can
Take our love’s fall
Let all be bright red
Say you love me
Get to be a torture
You need not come with me to th’ end
I cannot yet endure your promise.
Comme il pleut
Fumée, mes mémoires efface
J’ m’appuie à toi et n’ fais pas d’ sons
Je t’ regarde
J’ vois une beauté variée
Je t’aime
Comme je t’embrasse j’embrasse moi-même

Ma p’tite plaie qui se cache mais n’ s’en va jamais, une
Langueur monotone
Cette excuse douce que t’évites mais n’ dépose jamais,
Yeah, me fait pourrir l’esprit !

Dis que tu m’aimes
Un salut deviens donc
Laisse-moi car c’est mieux
Tue l’amour, et
Que tout soit rouge clair
Dis que tu m’aimes
Une torture deviens donc
Tu dois pas m’ suivre jusqu’à la fin
Je n’ peux pas supporter ta promission
As it rains
Let smoke dilute my mem’ries
I lean on you and make no sound
Watching you
I see a varied sweetness
Lovin' you,
As I trap you, I trap my own self

That my soft wound I try to hide but ne'er can wipe off
Is a dull pain
That sweet quibbling you avoid but ne'er stop fully,
Yeah, will make my spirit rot!

Sayin' you love me
Has come to be a greeting
Best leave me while you can
Take our love’s fall
Let all be bright red
Sayin' you love me
Has come to be a torture
You need not come with me to the end
And I cannot endure your promise.
Comme il pleut
Fumée, mes mémoires efface
J’ m’appuie à toi et n’ fais pas d’ sons
Je t’ regarde
J’ vois une douceur variée
En t'aimant,
Comme je te piège, je m' piège moi-même, ooh

La p’tite plaie que j' cache mais n’ peux pas effacer, c'est
Une langueur monotone
Cette excuse douce que t’évites mais n’ dépose jamais,
Yeah, me fait pourrir l’esprit !

Dire que tu m’aimes,
Un salut c'est devenu,
Laisse-moi car c’est mieux
Tue l’amour, et
Que tout soit rouge clair
Dire que tu m’aimes,
Une torture c'est devenu,
Tu dois pas m’ suivre jusqu’à la fin
Je n’ peux pas supporter ta promission
So a couple of things to note:
  • The Quora question from the other tab did not yield a thing;
  • On the other hand, more on this song here; in particular, more on the dubious part, thanks to one Chinese guy's interpretation;
  • On the way, I realized I had the lyrics wrong here; indeed it's 濕氣/湿气 shīqì, not 塵氣/尘气 chénqì.
With that said, I translated this song, anew in the English and French cases:
  1. To English on 23/12/23 at 10:51-11:28 with tweaks later that morning; I'm not entirely satisfied with it though;
    • The famous dubious part went though «Dropping this love / To the ground forcefully» and «Letting this love / Bleed abundantly», or «Bleed out copiously», following the guy's interpretation, until I found «Break this love, / Let the ground shine red brightly» at 12:49, for more literality, but still it doesn't feel good;
    • The penultimate line, for rhyming reasons, got the variants «You do not need with me to stay», «You need not stay always with me -> forever», but I just couldn't get the end; I was trying to rhyme with «Is a torture for me», which I then changed at 11:40, so now I was rhyming with you, not me; buntled with it came «I cannot bear this promise from yōu», and finally I found «You need not forever be true» / «You needn't be forevêr true», but what to do about the end? Leave the stretched-out you? Maybe; I tried «You needn't stay with me till the end», but nope;
  2. To French 23/12/23 13:09-13:12 for the first section, then at 18:43-18:47 I fixed «Une langueur monotone», evidently stolen from Verlaine, to «Une monotone langueur», and tried fixing the last line of that section with «Mon âme en a douleur», «D'mon âme les tourmenteurs», «Me détruit l'âme sans cœur», «D'mon âme le pourfenteur», but none quite convinces me; for now I'll choose the most convincing one, eventually I'll remake the whole section, as well as the last section which I haven't touched on yet; and the very next day I throw away that «La p’tite plaie que j' cache mais n’ peux pas effacer, c'est / Une monotone langueur / Cette excuse douce que t’évites mais n’ dépose jamais, / Yeah, mon âme en a douleur !» and complete the remake at 13:25-13:49;
The singer here suggests to end the relationship because she sees her partner is distant ("Saying you love me / Has become a greeting") and feels she cannot bear the weight of a promise to "come with me to the end". Quora'ed what 把爱坠落让满地鲜红 means at this link. Let's see it!


下着雨
让湿气稀释回忆
我靠着你不出声音
看着你
看着斑驳的甜蜜
爱你
困住你也困住我自己

我那躲也躲不掉的微妙伤口
隐隐作痛
你那戒也戒不掉的甜蜜借口
也让我精神腐朽

说你爱我
变成一种问候
不如趁早放手
把爱坠落
让满地鲜红
说你爱我
变成一种折磨
不用陪我走到最后
我承担不起你的承诺



As it rains,
To drown my mem'ries I try.
I make no sound, with you I lie.
Bitterness
And sweetness in you I see.
This love,
Like it traps you, it also traps me

This here subtle wound I just cannot help feeling
Pains me dully.
Those excuses you just cannot help keep making
Bring decay deep into me!

"Love you, darling"
Is just a greeting to me,
We'd be best off parting,
Break this love,
Let the ground shine red brightly
"Love you, darling"
Is a torture for you,
You need not forever be true:
I cannot bear this promise from yōu
Xiàzhe yǔ
Ràng shíqì xīshì huíyì
Wǒ kàozhe nǐ bù chū shēngyīn
Kànzhe nǐ
Kànzhe bānbó de tiánmì
Ài nǐ
Kùnzhù nǐ yě kùnzhù wǒ zìjǐ

Wǒ nà duǒ yě duǒ bù diào de wéimiào shāngkǒu
Yǐnyǐn zuòtòng
Nǐ nà jiè yě jiè bù diào de tiánmì jièkǒu
Yě ràng wǒ jīngshén fǔxiǔ

Shuō nǐ ài wǒ
Biànchéng yīzhǒng wènhòu
Bùrú chènzǎo fàngshǒu
Bǎ ài zhuìluò
Ràng mǎn dì xiānhóng
Shuō nǐ ài wǒ
Biànchéng yīzhǒng zhémó
Bùyòng péi wǒ zǒu dào zuìhòu
Wǒ chéngdān bù qǐ nǐ de chéngnuò



La pluie tombe,
J'laisse me noye mes pensées.
J'fais pas un son à tes côtés.
J'te regarde
Je vois du doux e d'l'amer.
T'aimer
Te tient attrapé, me tient attrapée, ooh

Cettė plaie profonde que j'sens et j'n'y peux rien faire
Me donne douleur et ennui.
Ces excuses q'tu donnes toujours et t'n'y peux rien faire
Font pourrir mon âme aussi !

Dire que tu m'aimes
N'est qu'un salut pour toi,
C'est mieux si tu t'en vas:
Qu'l'amour tombe
Et l'sol brille avec son sang !
Dire que tu m'aimes
C'est une torture pour toi.
Rester toujours avec moi, tu dois pas !
Cette promission est trop grande pour moi !

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