Saturday 26 August 2017

Yet more heartache

Today I bring you two more songs titled "Heartache". The first one is a Mandarin song by Huan Zi. «I ran into it during my first year of studying Chinese, that is the last year of high school, precisely around April/May. The second song is the Hakka version of that song, a translation by Youtube user mirvin lim. The video seems to have been pulled down, unfortunately. I ran into it not too long after the Mandarin one», said the old post.
To be precise, the diary entry for 11/7/12 records 12/5 as the meeting date for the Hakka version, found accidentally while looking for a video of this song by the characters 心痛. It's a weird thing that I found the Hakka video like that, because its title has no characters. At any rate, the Mandarin actually came later (and the reversed order of my original guess is probably because the translations were in the reverse order, cfr. below), and is first recorded in a Google save from 16/5/12 22:09, appearing next in Firefox session 8 from 20/5, where session 7 is 12/5. This resonates with the diary, which adds that on 21/5 I «preparo sim-thung sia in Hakka che in Mandarino per tradurla domani, […] e comunque l’Hakka non lo posso tradurre perché non ho ancora finito di ricostruirlo né ci riesco» (prepare sim-thung both in Hakka and in Mandarin to translate it tomorrow [i.e. 22/5], […] and anyway I can't translate the Hakka because I haven't yet finished reconstructing it nor do I manage that». I assume I was going to translate both soon, but failed to finish the Hakka reconstruction and got swallowed up by school stuff, because the translation seems to be from way later. Well, about this diary mention… so, it's written in the Science notebook on 21/5 and seems to refer to the afternoon, which makes no sense. Moreover, it's part of a long series of dates which skips 19/5 and has 20 and 21, so my guess is that it's actually 20/5 and I either miswrote or miscopied the last two dates.
I translated both to English, and the first one into Japanese as well. Let's see this translation by translation:
  1. The Chinese-English translation:
    1. It was actually done in English class on, guess what, 21/5 (one more minor reason to discredit that 21/5 entry as being 20/5, since I wouldn't have forgotten about a translation done in class, I suppose - assuming English was before Science, hence "minor"), in the original version below; it was done all out of order, but I won't bother recounting that order here;
    2. This version seems to have been forgotten, since then, in the 28/7/12 11:01 and 5/8/12 19:26 files, there is no trace of it, and the version that pops up in the following 18/8/12 15:27 file is different in a couple lines, including a change I then reverted in this post; the differences between the 18/8 version and the below final one are changes reported in the old intro to this post (except one):
      1. «you have to blame but thee» -> «you have to blame but me», which first appears in the attachment to a 17/3/13 19:31 email, eluding all files up to the 17/9/12 17:08 file;
      2. «Blame yourself that I have never» -> «Blame but me that I have never», ditto to the previous;
      3. Checkup day, moving Japanese to its own place with romanization, readying place for French, eliminating ruby tags from English… um, «Though I never have had you» is wrong, fixed ~18:13 1/7/19;
      4. Actually, this 3/3/13 17:59 Facebook post of mine shows all three of the above changes, and also one that had gotten lost on the way to the 17/3 attachment along with the previous one, namely «Your tears have soaked my clothes, / Gone through them they have» -> «Your tears have soaked my sleeve, / Gone through it they have», which I will now implement, at 14:49 on 9/1/22; this post says it wants to «go over Friday's correction», and 3/3/13 was a Sunday, meaning these corrections are from 1/3/13;
      5. «[1/7/19] ~18:38:30 that "bide" should be "bid", fixing in a sec»;
      6. «As I add the dating info and the mistranslation of the Hakka at the bottom, I see «You this leaving’s why», and fix it. It's 16:16 on 12/11/21»;
  2. The Chinese-Japanese translation only appears in the 3/9/12 file (the song does not appear in a lyrics file from 25/8/12 10:51, suggesting the translation antedates the file, or perhaps the thought of it postdates it), with the variant lines «もうたなかったのに» (sect. 2 l. 2), «きみれ» (sect. 3 l. 2), «きみれ» (sect. 4 l. 2), all of which unfortunately only get fixed between the 17/9/12 18:08 file and the 17/3/13 19:31 attachment; however, considering they're all consequences of corrections from that Fb post, I'd say they were only done post-1/3/13;
  3. The Chinese-French translation was done directly in this post on 1/7/19, as recounted by the old intro: «Now time to do the French. Start 18:15:45, 18:28:54 change «crévé» to «blessé» in l. 5 from the bottom, 18:30 change «mais une excuse j'l'ai pas trouvée», gosh that last rhyme is hard… 18:36:36 solved»; however, on 9/1/22 at 15:46, in line with change d of the English version, «Mes vêtements par tes larmes / Sont trempés» needs a change;
  4. The Hakka-English translation, which is maybe not too mis- because the video had Indonesian subtitles along with Karaoke Hakka, appears first in a file from 18/8/12 20:54, not appearing in the previous file which is from the same day at 15:27, so one would assume it was only translated that day; except the mega-intro places it on 12/8/12, and I've found the manuscript which also dates it to 12/8 and has the below manuscript version, which is slightly different from the 18/8 file version, so I assume the 18/8 is the exact date of the copying and tweaking; also, the English notebook begs to differ, reporting a very partial translation from 22/5 which is very different than what appears below and was most definitely forgotten about; the last little bit was done first, basically at the start of the lesson, and then the rest was done in order; it's reported, with its gaps filled (marked with []) 9/1/22 15:21-15:32, on the left of the current English version, while the 18/8 (mis)translation with its surroundings from the file is at the bottom; to fill the gaps, I used my partial characterification and the literal English translation of the Indonesian captions I have in one of my files; the latter gave me «I'll say my heart's loved you forever / But act'lly I've never existed»; «After hugging me you go away» in the lost original becomes «After huggin' you leave me and go» on 10/1/22 at 2:11 am;
Let's see all this stuff then!

心痛(欢子)

你的脸贴在我胸口
泪水早已渗透了
我的衣袖
你我都沉默了许久
不该说的话
你终于说出口
拥抱过后你转身就走
我笑着说再见
心却在颤抖
我已没有勇气问你
离开的理由

想说声爱你已很久
可我从来都没有
以前我对你不够好
我也很难受

只怪自己当初没有
抓紧你的手
失去了你我才知道
你有多重要
现在说后悔也没有用
心虽然很痛

只怪自己当初没有
将爱说出口
现在想说声爱你
已找不到借口
失去你以后
我连呼吸也好难受
Heartache (Huan Zi)

On my chest you're leaning your face => [other version]
Your tears have choþ? soaked my clothes,
t Right though them went they Gone through them [they] have
Long ago our silence did start.
The words you should not have [said]
You then did say.
After huggin' me you turn and go
My heart shakes as I say goodbye => smile
I have never asked you to show. [and bide you goodbye
This your leaving's why.

I'll say I've for so long loved you
Though I never have had you
I wasn't good enough to you
I feel sad, I do!

That youI didn't hold your hand
You have to blame but me
Now I've lost you I can know
You mean so much to me
Now regretting can of no use be
My heart g[rieves?] hurts greatly.

Blame yourself that I have never
Told you I love you
N[ow?] I now want to tell you but
I can't find an excuse
After losing you
I'll lose my ease in breathingh too.
Heartache (Huan Zi)

You’re leaning your face on my heart
Your tears have soaked my sleeve,
Gone through it they have
Long ago our silence did start
The words you should not have said
You then did say
After huggin’ me you turn and go
My heart shakes as I smile
And bid you good-bye
I have not had courage to ask
This your leaving’s why

I’ll say I’ve for so long loved you
Though I never have told you
I wasn’t good enough to you
I feel sad, I do!

That I didn’t hold your hand
You have to blame but me
Now I’ve lost you I can know
You mean so much to me
Now regretting can of no use be
My heart hurts greatly

Blame but me that I have never
Told you I love you
I now want to tell you but
I can’t find an excuse
After losing you
I’ll lose my ease in breathing too


こころ いたみ(ファン

むねかおいた
なみだ
そでけた
僕達ぼくたち ながだまった
わないはず
きみった
つつあと きみ
こころ
またね”と
なんはなすとぼく
わなかった

ながあいしてた
もうわなかったのに
十分じゅうぶんかった
かなしいんで

つながなかったから
ぼく
くしたいま
どうに重要じゅうようなと
悔悟かいごやくたない
こころ いた

あいわなかったから
ぼく
いたいけど
口実こうじつつけない
くすあと
呼吸こきゅうにもいたむよ




林保明的“心痛”(客家话)

你(的)面在我(的)肩头
目水眼泪已经流
渗透我的衫裤衣服
多恋爱这(么)多久
应该讲
结却终于讲出来
拥抱够离开
笑讲再见
甚至想开
真心来问
离开理由

想讲心爱
可惜从来毋识不曾
以前够好
也好难过

只怪自己
你(的)
正知
汝对多重要
今下如今讲后悔也


只怪自己
一句爱讲出
今下如今想讲出爱
接嘴破冰
时候
我(的)心痛也恁难过



Heartache, by Mirvin Lim (Hakka)



Your face on my shoulder you lean
Your tears have gone down deep,
My clothes are dripping
We have loved each other so long
[Then you said the words]
[That you should not have said]
[After huggin' you leave me and go]
[I say goodbye]
[And think my heart means something]
I'm not serious in asking you => I do not
[This your leaving's why]     [seriously ask you

[I'll say my heart's loved you so long]
[I've never really had you though]
I used to be less good to you
[I'm also so sad!]

[Blame yourself that I then never]
[Held your hand so tight,]
[Just now that you've gone, I know]
[You mean so much to me]
[Speaking of regret now has no use / is useless now]
[In my heart I hurt]

[Blame yourself that I then didn't]
[Speak of any love]
[Now I want to say it, but]
It's def'ni'ly too late
If yuo go away
My heart will suffer such a lot.




你嘅面在雅嘅肩头
目水一进流很多
浸雅衫褲
你啀多恋爱了多久
唔应该讲嘅呙
结却讲出来
你nam keu离开啀hang en 走(?)
啀笑讲再见
惟心都像一痛/通/童
啀也无真心来问你
离开嘅理由

想讲心爱你投很久
可惜啀从来不实有
一前啀对你唔够好
啀也好难过

只怪自己其时无
抓bun来你嘅手 本来?奔来?
只你去了啀正知
你对啀多重要
今暇讲后悔也係无用
心土里(??)很痛

只怪自己其时
一季爱无讲出coi
今暇想讲出爱你
寻不到来借在(??)
你去了时候
雅嘅心痛也很难过

Nǐ kǎi miàn zài yǎ kǎi jiāntóu
Mùshuǐ yī jìnliú hěnduō
Jìn yǎ shānkù
Nǐ ái duō liàn'àile duō jiǔ
Wú yīnggāi jiǎng kǎi guō
Jié què jiǎngchūlái
Nǐ nam keu líkāi ái hang en zǒu (?)
Ái xiào jiǎng zàijiàn
Wéi xīn dōu xiàng yī tòng/tōng/tóng
Ái yě wú zhēnxīn lái wèn nǐ
Líkāi kǎi lǐyóu

Xiǎng jiǎng xīn ài nǐ tóu hěnjiǔ
Kěxí ái cónglái bù shíyǒu
Yīqián ái duì nǐ wú gòu hǎo
Ái yě hǎo nánguò

Zhǐ guài zìjǐ qí shí wú
Zhuā bun lái nǐ kǎi shǒu běnlái / bēn lái
Zhǐ nǐ qùle ái zhèng zhī
Nǐ duì ái duō chóngyào
Jīnxiá jiǎng hòuhuǐ yě xì wúyòng
Xīntǔ lǐ (??) hěn tòng

Zhǐ guài zìjǐ qí shí
Yī jì ài wú jiǎng chū coi
Jīnxiá xiǎng jiǎngchū ài nǐ
Xún bù dàolái jièzài (??)
Nǐ qùle shíhou
Yǎ kǎi xīntòng yě hěn nánguò
Xīntòng (Huān Zǐ)

Nǐ de liǎn tiē zài wǒ xiōngkǒu
Lèishuǐ zǎoyǐ shèntòule
Wǒ de yīxiù
Nǐ wǒ dōu chénmòle xǔjiǔ
Bù gāi shuō de huà
Nǐ zhōngyú shuō chūkǒu
Yǒngbào guòhòu nǐ zhuǎnshēn jiù zǒu
Wǒ xiàozhe shuō zàijiàn
Xīn què zài chàndǒu
Wǒ yǐ méiyǒu yǒngqì wèn nǐ
Líkāi de lǐyóu

Xiǎng shuō shēng ài nǐ yǐ hěnjiǔ
Kě wǒ cónglái dōu méiyǒu
Yǐqián wǒ duì nǐ bùgòu hǎo
Wǒ yě hěn nánshòu

Zhǐ guài zìjǐ dāngchū méiyǒu
Zhuājǐn nǐ de shǒu
Shīqùle nǐ wǒ cái zhīdào
Nǐ yǒu duō chóngyào
Xiànzài shuō hòuhuǐ yě méiyǒu yòng
Xīn suīrán hěn tong

Zhǐ guài zìjǐ dāngchū méiyǒu
Jiàng ài shuō chūkǒu
Xiànzài xiǎng shuōshēng ài nǐ
Yǐ zhǎo bù dào jièkǒu
Shīqù nǐ yǐhòu
Wǒ lián hūxī yě hǎo nánshòu



Mal de cœur (Huan Zi)

Ta tête sur mon sein est posée,
Tes larmės m'ont déjà
Trempé les manchės
Par si longtemps on s'est aimés,
C'que tu n'aurais pas dû dire,
Enfin t'as dit
Après d'un embras tu t'en est allée,
Mon cœur tremblait
Lorsque j'te saluais
J'ai pas eu l'courage de demander
Ta raison d'partir.

Ainsi longtemps je t'ai aimée,
Bien que je ne t'l'aie dit jamais.
Je n'étais ainsi bon pour toi,
C'est triste pour moi!

Tout parce que j'n'avais pas le courage
De t'nir ta main,
Tu étais si tant pour moi,
En t'perdant je l'vois bien!
Il est inutile de regretter,
Bien que l' cœur soit blessé…

Tout parce que j'n'avais pas l'courage
De dir qu'je t'aimais,
Je l'veux dire maint'nant,
Mais une excuse j'peux pas trouver!
Lorsque j't'ai perdue,
Même respirer me fait mal de plus!


Kokoro itami (Fan Zu)

Mune ni sono kao wo oita
Namida ga
Kono sode wo tsuketa
Bokutachi nagaku damatta
Iwanai hazu wo
Kimi ga itta
Tsutsumu ato kimi ga iku
Kokoro yure
"Mata ne" to iu
Nande hanasu to boku
Towanakatta

Nagaku ai shiteta
Mô iwanakatta no ni
Jūbun ni yoku nakatta
Kanashii n de

Te wo tsunagatta kara
Boku wo kore
Nakushita ima
Dô ni jūyôna to shiru
Kaigo mo yaku ni tatanai
Kokoro itamu

Ai wo iwanakatta kara
Boku wo kore
Iitai kedo
Kôjitsu wo mitsukenai
Nakusu ato
Kokyū ni mo itamu yo




Lîm Pó-mîn kài "sim-thùng" (Hak-ka-fà)

Nya kài mièn tshoi nga kài kien-thêu
Muk-shúi yí-kin lîu àn to
Tsìm nga sam-khù
Nyî ngâi to lièn-òi lî to kíu
M yin-koi kóng kài voi
Kiet-khiủk kóng chut-lôi
Nyî nám kèu lî-khoi ngâi hâng-tén tséu
Ngâi siàu kóng tsài-kièn
Và sim tú sióng yıt thung
Ngâi ya mô cin-sim lôi mùn nyî
Lî-khoi kài li-yìu

Sióng kóng sim òi nyî tèu àn kíu
Khó-sit ngâi tshiûng-lôi m-shit yìu
Yi-tshiên ngâi tùi nyî m-kèu hó
Ngâi ya hó nân-kwò

Che kwái tshìi-kí kai-shî mô
Ca-vún lôi nya kài shíu
Che nyî hì-lí ngâi cang ti
Nyî tùi ngâi to chùng-yàu
Kin-hà kóng hèu-fùi ya hè mô-yùng
Sim tú-lí àn thùng

Che kwái tshìi-kí kai-shî
Yıt kì òi mô kóng chut-còi
Kin-hà sióng kóng-chut òi nyî
Tshîm-m-tó lôi tsiap-tsúi
Nyî hì-lí shî-hèu
Nga kài sim-thùng ya àn nân-kwò



Heartache, by Mirvin Lim (Hakka)
Your face on my shoulder now lies
Your tears ahave flowned a lot,
My cloþes are drippin'
We have loved each oþer so long
Then U said þe words
Þt U shld [not] hv said
After hugging me you go away
I smile and say goodbye[,]
My heart's all painful
I have ne’er sincerely asked you
Why you’re leaving me

Want to say I’ve loved you for long
Thou[gh]Too bad I never d[id]could have you
I wasn’t good enough to you
I feel sad, I do!

Blame yourself that I oncethen didn’t
Hold tight to your hand
Now that you’ve gone away I do know
How much you mean to me
Now having regrets is useless too
My h[eart] In my heart I grieve

Blame myself that I for long
Did not say I loved you
Now I want to say it but
Cannot find an excuse
Since you now have gone
My heartache is so hard to bear
Your face on my shoulder now lies
Your tears have flowed a lot,
My clothes are dripping
We have loved each other so long
Then you said the words
That you should not have said
After hugging me you go away
I smile goodbye and think
I will get o'er this.
I have ne’er sincerely asked you
Why you’re leaving me

I wanna say I’ve loved you so for long
Too bad I never could have you
I wasn’t good enough to you
I feel sad, I do!

Blame myself that I once didn’t
Hold your hand so tight
Now you’ve gone away I know
How much you mean to me
My regrets now aren't of any use
In my heart I grieve

Blame myself that I for long
Did not say I loved you
Now I want to speak my love
But cannot break the ice
Since you now have gone
My heartache is so hard to bear




Nyia kai mien choi nga kai kien-teu
Muk-sui jit kin-liu an-to
Tin nga sam-khu
Ngi ngai to lien-oi li to kiu
Ng jin-khoi kong kai boi
Kiet khiuk kong chut-loi
Ngi nam keu li-khoi ngai hang en ceu
Ngai siau kong cai-kien
Wa sim tu siong jit thung
Ngai ya mo cin-sim loi mun ngi
Li-khoi kai li-jiu

Siong kong sim oi ngi teu an kiu
Kho-sit ngai chung-loi ng sit-jiu
Jit-chien ngai tui ngi ng keu-ho
Ngai ya ho nan-ko

Se kai chi-ki kai si mo
Ca bun loi nya kai siu
Se ngi hi-li ngai cang ti
Ngi tui ngai to chung-jau
Kin-ha kong heu-fui ya he mo-jung
Sim tu-li an thung

Se kai chi-ki kai si
Jit-ki oi mo kong chut coi
Kin-ha siong kong-chut oi ngi
Chim ng to-loi ciap-coi
Ngi hi-li si-heu
Nga kai sim-thung ya an nan-ko

Your face on my shoulder now lies
Your tears have flowed a lot,
My clothes are dripping
We have loved each other so long
Then you said the words
That you should not have said
After hugging me you go away
I smile and say goodbye,
My heart’s all painful
I have ne’er sincerely asked you
Why you’re leaving me

Want to say I’ve loved you for long
Too bad I never could have you
I wasn’t good enough to you
I feel sad, I do!

Blame yourself that I once didn’t
Hold tight to your hand
Now you’ve gone away I know
How much you mean to me
Now having regrets is useless too
In my heart I grieve

Blame yourself that I for long
Did not say I loved you
Now I want to say so
But cannot find an excuse
Since you now have gone
My heartache is so hard to bear

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